World Without Women

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World Without Women

Postby Wynn on Tue May 24, 2005 3:42 pm

http://forums.worldofwarcraft.com/threa ... 240753&P=1

Written by a chick at Western Washington University.

Your World of Warcraft is Also Your World Without Women
By: Brittany Young


I’m sure by now most of the residents in Nash Hall have experienced the cult following that is World of Warcraft. I’m also sure that the majority of men in the building either has given into this phenomenon individually, or has a roommate, friend, or RA that’s fallen. Being one of the many women in Nash Hall involved in a relationship with a man whose life is no longer his own, I have a few things to say.

1. Realistically, most girls despise World of Warcraft. With the exception of Sara Taylor (girlfriend of Brett Williams, lucky dog) and very few others, girls just have no interest in it whatsoever. We do not care what level you just hit, we do not care what boss you’re about to kill, we do not care how many days you’ve spent wasting your life away, and we absolutely DO NOT care how “f-ing” hot your character is. So stop telling us or you’ll be single very, very soon. No one wants to date a junkie.

2. Don’t you have class or something? It seems to me that we live in a government sponsored insitution, NOT in your mom’s basement. I don’t think President Bush would be very happy to hear that his funding is going toward a Univeristy full of ridiculous boys who are wasting the public’s hard earned tax dollars. How much does it cost to attend Western? And how much does your account cost a month? I won’t even bring up the point that you are here to study and gain ACTUAL, not computer animated, knowledge, and that you could be saving mucho dinero staying in your own house and letting someone live in Nash who actually deserves to be here. Anyone ever heard that song by Ben Folds Five, “Song for the Dumped?” Yeah. That’s what I thought.

3. Hey, have you ever heard the words “Personal Hygiene?” I think not. The smell wafting down from the 3rd, 5th, and 6th floors has caused us ladies of floor 1 to invest in a serious supply of air fresheners. This has been caused by a lack of energy and common sense, obviously stolen by Warcraft to fuel the obsession. When was the last time you actually took a shower? I know for a fact that several residents on the 5th and 6th floors have gone about 3 days without showering, and usually wear the same shirts and pair of underwear for days on end. No wonder everyone’s door is always locked. They are trying to keep the smell stifled inside their room, which is disgusting. TLC had it right when they didn’t want No Scrubs. You scrubby boys had better knock if off.

4. What the hell are those stupid headsets? Do you work in the Taco Bell drive-thru? It sure smells like it on your floor. If so, I’d better be getting a discount. What, do you need reassurance that you actually do have friends who understand your addiction? You wonder why girls go to the bathroom in pairs, or why they get pissed when you can’t tell what they are thinking. This is the same thing, and just as mind-boggling. Why do you need to talk to other computer nerds while playing the game? Does your score improve with the number of friends you have online? Or maybe you met your other girlfriend who is 36, divorced, and lives in Kentucky with her 15 cats. Sure sounds like a winner to me.

5. What is your age again? Last time I checked, Western Washington University did not admit 12 year old boys into its academic program. I don’t think the admissions office would be too pleased to hear about the progress of its North Campus students. It’s nice that you college men have found a piece of common ground, but honestly this is ridiculous. If you have your RA, your roommate, your friends across the hall, your girlfriend’s ex boyfriend, and the guy who beat you last week in poker all on the same server going on a quest, you know you’ve hit rock bottom. I wouldn’t be surprised if the next thing I see is someone running down the hall with a pillowcase cape tied around their neck, scantily clad in Power Rangers underwear, crying because so-and-so just stole their star wars action figure or holographic Pokemon card. Honestly, that’s just not okay.


Be happy that I chose to keep the concerns to only 5. I know these perfectly valid points may be hard for some of you to hear. But realistically, it’s the truth. The moral of the story is; boys, don’t ignore girls of any status, girlfriend or not girlfriend, just to sit around all night in your boxers with chip crumbs on your belly, playing this infernal game. Keep it up, and the words “we need to talk” or “this just isn’t working out” or even the dreaded “I met someone else” will arise in the not so distant future. And I can just see each and every one of you, sitting there dumbfounded as to what could have possibly gone wrong. Everything was just so perfect. Speaking of which, I don’t think we should see each other anymore. Have a good life alone in Molten Core.
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Postby Monster on Wed May 25, 2005 5:44 am

It sounds like somebody isn't hot enough to compete with WoW.
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